On Monday, I changed.
For better? For worse? Whoms’t is to judge? I’ll leave it up to the mainstream media. But I’ve officially scarred my body with the most recognizable piece of IP (intellectual property, Jeff) and there’s no going back (pun intended). I’ve had this idea for probably eight or nine years but I never had the balls to pull the trigger on it. There was no alcohol, no drugs, no outside influences that pushed me to get this monumental addition that will forever live on me. It was all me.
That’s where I went wrong through these first few weeks of the CFB season. I went 10-12 last week and I’m 28-28 overall on the year. There’s nothing wrong with being .500, but it’s unacceptable in my eyes. I’ve been absolutely moosed making these picks every night that I’ve written this blog. Each Thursday night just knocking backing multiple fingers worth of Teremana or cheap bourbon from the DCB (Discount Cigarettes and Beer) right down the road and a mix of some extracurriculars to top it off. I gotta lock in. I gotta be me and make these picks on my own merit.
So I’ve gone back to what I know best: Basil Hayden. It fueled me on the Bengals run to the Super Bowl a couple years ago and it’s my true bread and butter. It’s time to lock in.
Of note, the (unidentified) SEC Insider is on a roll. 2-0 on the mouthwatering picks, 7-4 overall in 2023, and a winning record since 2022. The Jane/John Doe that is the Prem League Advisor had a successful debut, hitting on a parlay that made us all some Jane/John dough. My NFL picks continue to suck. I went 3-5 last week and I’m 9-12 on the season, but this blog isn’t about that.
We are going to win as a unit this week. We just have to.
Let’s get to the picks.
CFB (28-30 in 2023 / 135-126-1 since 2022):
Dominic Toretto’s “Take it or leave it” Pick of the Week (2-1 in 2023, 8-6-1 overall): Arkansas at LSU (over 54.5) – LSU is actually good. Just forget about the FSU game in week one. I think they can score 42 on their own so we’ll bet on Arkansas to cover the rest.
Georgia State at Coastal Carolina (-6.5 and over 62) – GAST has at least 35 points in each game and they’ve played shit competition, the only time Coastal hasn’t hit 30 was at UCLA week one. I’m back on the mic for HSFB Thursday night so these are blind, set-it-and-forget-it picks. – DOUBLE LOSS
Wisconsin at Purdue (under 53.5) – A Friday night B1G game feels like it has the makings to be a traditional, ugly B1G game.
NC State at Virginia (over 47.5) – UVA has given up 49, 36, and 42 points in three games. That is all.
Oklahoma at Cincinnati (+14.5) – I’ll buy low on the Cats. Bad loss to Love and Honor, but Emory Jones is good and has played in big games like this. If it was 13.5 I may have stayed away.
Boston College (+13.5) at Louisville – I watched most of the IU-UofL game last week and I do not believe in the Cards. Each of BC’s games have been decided by three points or less.
FSU at Clemson (+2.5) – I’m gonna bet all the big games on Saturday. Dabo is 11-4 ATS as an underdog against ranked opponents.
Colorado at Oregon (-21) – I feel bad doing this cause I rode the Buffs each of the first few weeks, but this feels like a game that Oregon should win easily. They’re the better team plain and simple.
Ole Miss (+7) at Alabama – That video of Saban walking off the field soaked in rain water left a bad taste in my mouth. (Editor’s note: this pick was made prior to my receiving of the Insider’s picks, so I am a tad worried about this)
UCLA at Utah (over 52.5) – 2:30 CDT kickoff tells me the defenses won’t be up for this game and I love Pac-12 overs.
BYU at Kansas (over 54.5) – Jayhawks have Jalon Daniels back and they look good. BYU has 41 and 38 points in their last two. This screams the over.
Oregon State (-3) at Washington State – Mainstream bias influenced this decision.
OSU at Notre Dame (+3) – Yeah. Just my gut feeling. Apologies to those offended seeing this. (Editor’s note: this pick was made prior to my receiving of the Insider’s picks, so I am a tad worried about this)
Memphis (+6.5) vs Mizzou in St. Louis – Mizzou may be good, but I don’t think they’re a sure bet. Neutral game and I’m sure Memphis will travel well enough.
Buffalo at UL Lafayette (-10) – Another pick with mainstream influence involved.
SEC Insider picks of the weekend (7-4 in 2023, 29-23-1 overall):
*The following is verbatim
Mouth Watering Pick of the Week (2-0 in 2023, 10-4 overall): Bama -7
We are at the point where Bama’s back is officially up against the wall. People calling into question if the Saban era is over. One more loss and that will be the case. Do we really think the Saban era dies at the hands of Joey Freshwater? This is a no brainer. I think the USF game was good for the Tide big picture and solidifies Milroe as the guy. Joyless murder ball
Buckeyes – 3
There is absolutely no home field advantage here. Expect plenty of scarlet to be in that stadium. Hartman is good with time but I’ve been told the silver bullets are back. Expect Sawyer/JT to bring some heat. Get the studs out wide involved and get out of south bend with a 7-10 point win.
LSU -17.5
LSU rolled last week on the road in impressive fashion. I think they’re the best team in the division and get a mediocre Arkansas team in Death Valley at night. Train keeps rolling.
Oregon Colorado under 70
70 points is a lot. I think Colorado comes back to earth with Travis being out. Dan Lanning makes somewhat of a statement here on D. Oregon front on D will bully that Buffs OLine. I haven’t heard much out of coach prime this week…wonder why? Writing is on the wall. Not willing to spank the line. But think Oregon wins somewhat comfortably.
Prem League Advisor pick of the weekend (1-0): “Manchester United to win -135. Fading another recent promote this week. United will be fired up after conceding 4 goals to Bayern in their Champions League loss on Wednesday. I think this one could get out of hand early”
Griffin Weinberg 